Saturday, December 24, 2011

Is that.. toilet paper???

Ok so even though I don't have any pictures to back up my story, I decided to share this one with you.  Just because it makes me laugh and cry and vomit a little, all at the same time.

Two weekends ago we are actually getting along, feeling a little bit more like friends than roommates.  The past few days leading up to Saturday we had talked more than we had in probably two months put together.  I try to play nice and suggest we go bowling with the boys.  Sounds like a fun time.

Art goes into the bathroom to "clean up" before Bart's basketball practice, he gets out and they leave.  From across the living room I notice as he gets out of the bathroom a small white spec on his neck.  More his cheek than his neck... his jaw line I guess.  Hmmm... he doesn't usually shave on the weekends, how odd.  Maybe he cut himself shaving.  I think nothing more of it, they're at their game for a few hours, I spend that time cleaning my room, doing laundry, etc.  When they return he asks if we're still going bowling, I say sure, I just wanted to finish this stuff up, take a shower, etc.

I do that and we go bowling.  Before we leave, in the kitchen, I notice that same white spot again.  Trying not to stare, on just a passing glance, it still looks like it might be toilet paper.  Ok, I thought he would have removed it at basketball, or it would have come off on its own.  Guess not. 

We take separate cars to go bowling and when we get there we're standing in line to get shoes... and there is that white spot.  It's just asking to be looked at.  It's very obvious.  SO... I look.

It's definitely not a boil.

I wouldn't call it a pimple. 

It's simply...




...a bubble of pus. 



Maybe it's his siamese twin that's been trapped inside him and it's finally breaking through to the surface.

If that's a pimple I've never seen a pimple like that in my life.  That's the most disproportionate pimple in the history of all pimples.  There was barely any red skin underneath it, and the "whitehead" was about half the size of the tip of my pinky.  Can you picture it???  Is it turning your stomach???  GOOD.  Now I'm not alone.

So my first thought is... HOW DO YOU NOT SEE THAT?????  And if you do see it, how do you not get rid of it?!?!?!?!?

We order food and I make sure to position myself on the OTHER side of the Pus Monster growing out of the side of his neck.  After we eat, we bowl, and I can't help but look at the Pus Ball. 

Throughout the day he goes into the bathroom several times.  Out comes the Pus Ball.  Really?  It's practically GLOWING - how do you not take care of that? 

I can't help but laugh when thinking of him walking around with Mr. Pus McPusington clinging to the side of his neck all day, and what people must have been thinking.  Probably what I've been thinking all day:  "Eww.  GROSS." 

Finally LATER that night - I mean later later, I finally see the Pus Bubble is gone.  Did he actually remove it, or did it rub off on something?   Did the Pus Pressure increase to uncontainable amounts that it finally erupted??? The thought makes me shudder.  We do share a hand towel in the bathroom...  But you better believe we won't be any more. 

After this week's soap incident it all makes sense. 




Perhaps if you rubbed the soap on your skin, colonies of bacteria wouldn't feel they had the right to create a Bio-Dome on your FACE.




...and the crescent is still there.  Just in case you were wondering.  Since Monday.  It's now Saturday.  Stay tuned.

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