Count Stankula

Ok so before I get into this next one, I have to just say that I'm feeling some guilt.  Because Art is a nice guy, and a good person.  I feel like I'm evil for doing this - but no one knows who he is unless you're really close to me (and those close to me would never give away my secrets) so that makes me feel a little bit better.  And I'm not attacking him personally, just his hygiene habits - which are clearly questionable.... 


But he is a good person and incredibly talented and we are friends and I shouldn't be doing this... 


...ok on to my next story.  



Last night I was getting ready for bed and he says that one of his online author friends wants him to take a picture of himself as a vampire, because she had written a vampire book and he had illustrated the cover.  He asks if I'd be willing to take pictures of him, I say sure. 


So I ask him how he's going to make himself look like a vampire - he has a plan - ketchup!!!!!


I go get my phone and come back and he looks like a murder scene - ketchup EVERYWHERE!  Matted in his hair, all on the side of his face and all of his neck, behind his ear, a big hand print on his shirt, etc.  He put a bunch of catalina dressing in a wine glass and has a plan for the picture. 


He lights a candle and we turn off the lights. 


He starts posing for his picture, with the glass, without the glass, "blood" oozing from his fingers, from his mouth, etc.  I say "Put some on your teeth and then lick your teeth!!!"  And so he starts "finger brushing" his teeth with the catalina dressing and saying "uck this is gross" and I'm just LAUGHING on the inside thinking "well at least you're pretend brushing..." 


So we take pictures and he's getting antsy - he says "Hurry up - I can't wait to get this stuff off me!!!" so I think well now he will definitely use the soap so I'll have to "reset" my tracking.



We take a few more pictures, turn on the lights, he goes into the bathroom and I look at the mess he made on the table.  I tell him from the kitchen that he better clean up his mess and I start walking to my room, I see the bathroom door is open...


... and I see...




...him in the bathroom over the sink, rinsing off with water. 



WHAT?



Why wouldn't you just jump in the shower to WASH OFF with soap and shampoo????????


This morning when I showered the crescent was still there, of course.  And now I wouldn't be surprised if it's still there tonight when I get home from work. 


I marked my soap and my boy's body wash so I'll know if he uses it. 


I'm not holding my breath.  Maybe I should.